Lessons from a 4 month old NYC stage manager
Something that I find to be quite disappointing is that so few people know what a stage manager actually does. I’m a part of this facebook group to help me find jobs (hire me :P) and a couple weeks ago when it was national stage manager day, they sparked a conversation about all of the stereotypes that go along with being a stage manager. Eye bags, over caffeinated, god mics, strict, pounds of paperwork, which in complete honesty, can be true. The conversation progressed to how so much of this could be prevented if we had the right kind of support, or even if others in the industry understand why these are the results of us doing our job. It’s a shame, but true. So much of this could be solved if people actually knew what a stage manager does.
I worked on a show where I don’t think the rest of the production team, which was so small, understood what my job was. That just makes it hard to do my job at the end of the day. I know what I’m supposed to be doing, and yet when I try to do it someone else wants to be a part of it and removes me from the equation. This has been a lesson in letting things go. When it got to this point I had to grapple with the fact that I can only do what they let me. Sometimes people work differently and I can only follow the instructions to help them the best I can. In that contract, part of my job was written to “help the show in any way necessary.” At that point, the necessary thing for me to do was take a step back. Send less emails and let everything just flow.
I came to greatly dislike that project. I loved the show itself, the performers were incredibly talented, and I was so excited to work in a new space. But the interpersonal problems of the show had made it quite difficult to actually enjoy. I love my job at the end of the day, which is mostly paperwork and emails, but this project genuinely made me scared whenever I would get an email notification, and I love emails! I never knew what would happen next and I started to think about a conversation I had with my grandma one time. We were talking about something I didn’t want to do where she said to me, “well as long as you have an end date, you can do it. As long as people know something will end they can do anything,”. I call this the 10 second theory, because somewhere in my string of tv watching, someone was enduring torture (thanks NCIS) and they were told to count to 10, because you can do anything for 10 seconds. When that 10 is done, you start another 10. I knew that this experience would have an end date, I would get to go home and see my mom, have a nice vacation and work my silly waitress job for a little bit. I could last those 10 seconds.
Another large part of the job that I’ve come to notice is actually just your own personal confidence. Knowing that you belong where you are, that you know what to do, and that you are not your position helps wonders. It's definitely hard. That last job that gave me problems really made me question if I was actually good at my job. I come home and everyone that has worked with me repeatedly (i.e. Jake) is constantly saying that I will be running Broadway one day and am the best stage manager in New York. Besides the fact that if I have to work on 44th St someone will die and I don’t exactly want to work on big musicals like that, I don’t believe him. I am a ripe 4 month old NYC stage manager, clearly I still have a lot of growing to do. But that can’t stop me from reminding myself that I am good. When I was doing She Loves Me with Myles, Jake, and Gabi, we started this term for when I was in true stage manager mode, “toning”. It was really just me being so locked into my work that I didn’t always check how I was saying things. Jake tried to go sit with Gabi and Myles during a Q2Q and before he even made it halfway up the stairs I had him turn around, because I couldn’t let him distract the three of us from our work. He knew it wasn’t personal and that I still loved him, but we had work to do. The best compliment I received as a result of that show was that the industry needed more people who could “tone” and get the work done.
Anyway, a recap of my lessons:
You can do anything as long as you have an end date
Make sure you and the rest of the team you’re working with understands what you’re job is
You have to be sure of yourself (or at least able to fake it)
You can only do so much <3
Xoxo,
Randa
